What’s Your Natural Bonding Style?

Uncover the relational structure that actually fits your nervous system, desires, and soul—not just what you were taught.

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1. When you picture your ideal relationship, what feels most true?(Choose up to 6 answers.)

A. A main partner with space for occasional freedom.

B. One loyal, devoted partner, we’re all in, always.

C. A best friend, co-parent, or chosen family bond without romance.

D. Deep love with multiple partners, equally cared for.

E. I prefer total freedom to design relationships case by case.

F. Romance doesn’t really resonate. Loyalty and companionship matter more.

G. Independence first, I want multiple connections but won’t merge lives.

H. I’m choosing myself right now; singledom or celibacy feels most aligned.

I. I shift depending on the season of my life.

Choose up to 6 answers.

2. Your nervous system feels calmest when… (Choose up to 6 answers.)

A. I feel prioritized but still have room for play.

B. I know my partner is fully mine and I am theirs.

C. I’m deeply supported without sexual or romantic pressure.

D. I can share love openly with more than one person.

E. I belong to myself first, even while loving others.

F. I’m free to choose bonds without hierarchy or rules.

G. I don’t feel pulled toward romance at all.

H. I don’t need one answer; it changes with time.

I. My peace comes from focusing inward, not dating.

Choose up to 6 answers.

3. What does commitment look like for you? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Prioritization + occasional openness we agree on.

B. Exclusive loyalty, forever.

C. Lifelong loyalty, romance optional.

D. Multiple loves, all nurtured with care.

E. Loving others deeply while keeping my independence intact.

F. Deep bonds without romance at all.

G. Commitment to myself first, then chosen connections.

H. Whatever form fits where I’m at right now.

I. Commitment to truth and autonomy, not titles or hierarchy.

Choose up to 6 answers.

4. How do you usually process jealousy? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. I can handle it if I feel prioritized and reassured.

B. I rarely feel it; loyalty without romance feels safe.

C. I avoid it by valuing sovereignty above merging.

D. Depends on the season; sometimes I can, sometimes I can’t.

E. I avoid it by keeping love exclusive.

F. I don’t feel it much while focused on myself.

G. I face it with radical honesty and self-work.

H. I deconstruct it; jealousy is a product of hierarchy.

I. Romance doesn’t trigger me. It’s just not my framework.

Choose up to 6 answers.

5. Which phrase best describes your heart? (Choose up to 6 answers.)

A. “Love is abundant; I can share it openly.”

B. “One soulmate is all I need.”

C. “We’re solid, but freedom keeps us fresh.”

D. “Romance isn’t my language, but loyalty is.”

E. “My best friend is my life partner.”

F. “I belong to myself first.”

G. “I evolve, and so does my style.”

H. “No boxes. No hierarchy. Just truth.”

I. “I love without losing myself.”

Choose up to 6 answers.

6. What do you crave most in connection? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Security plus freedom.

B. Partnership without romance at all.

C. Safety and devotion.

D. Companionship without romance pressure.

E. Radical freedom + authenticity.

F. Solitude, healing, and self-trust.

G. Autonomy while loving multiple people.

H. Flexibility; no single answer fits forever.

I. Depth and variety at once.

Choose up to 6 answers.

7. Your ideal weekend includes… (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Cozy one-on-one time with my partner.

B. Deep connection without romance in the mix.

C. A mix of dates, group hangs, and multiple loves.

D. Dinner or adventures with my chosen family.

E. My own passions, plus space for partners if I choose.

F. A night out together, maybe with a flirty edge.

G. Sometimes partnered, sometimes solo, depends.

H. Spontaneous, non-scripted connection.

I. Time to myself, focused inward.

Choose up to 6 answers.

8. How do you define “family”? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Me and my one partner.

B. A couple with space to explore.

C. A polycule or interconnected web of loves.

D. Chosen family + life partners, romantic or not.

E. Companions I trust, even without romance.

F. Myself first, then multiple bonds that fit around me.

G. Whoever I choose, free of hierarchy.

H. A shifting mix that evolves with time.

I. Me, my growth, and maybe close friends.

Choose up to 6 answers.

9. Which challenge feels most difficult for you? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Feeling trapped without freedom.

B. Sharing my partner’s intimacy with others.

C. Balancing sovereignty with showing up for partners.

D. Juggling time and energy across partners.

E. Feeling unseen because I don’t want romance.

F. Avoiding isolation while focusing inward.

G. Explaining my bond to a world that doesn’t get it.

H. Staying consistent when my needs shift.

I. Avoiding chaos when everything is fluid and unstructured.

Choose up to 6 answers.

10. What role does sexuality play for you? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Important, exploration keeps it alive.

B. Central, for me and my one partner only.

C. Flexible, I may share it, but sovereignty comes first.

D. Optional, intimacy doesn’t have to be sexual.

E. Minimal, romance/sex don’t define my bonds.

F. Free expression, defined only by the people involved.

G. Not relevant right now, I’m focused inward.

H. A joyful way to bond with multiple partners.

I. Shifts depending on the season.

Choose up to 6 answers.

11. How do you want to feel in your relationships? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. Loved, but never boxed in.

B. Secure, cherished, protected.

C. Safe, supported, and understood without romance.

D. Free, sovereign, fully myself; even while loving.

E. Validated in loyalty, even without romance.

F. Unbound, authentic, radically free.

G. Seen, expressed, connected to many.

H. True to my shifting self.

I. Whole and centered in myself.

Choose up to 6 answers.

12. If a bond ended tomorrow, what would you take away? (Choose up to 6 answers.) *

A. That loyalty and friendship outlast romance.

B. That love is abundant and never wasted.

C. That I honored truth and autonomy above all.

D. That I gave my all to one person.

E. That my worth doesn’t depend on romance at all.

F. That choosing myself is never wasted time.

G. That I always belong to myself first.

H. That I loved fully and stayed true to myself.

I. That my needs change, and that’s okay.

Choose up to 6 answers.